I homeschool my three children and have done so since my oldest was in first grade. This year, my three children are in 8th grade, 6th grade, and 4th grade respectively. Homeschooling takes time, a lot of time.
All three of my children are on a USA swim team. Amber (13) practices 6 times a week, Mason (12) practices 5 times a week, and Duncan (9) practices 3 times a week. The swim season never ends - long course season morphs into short course season and on and on and on. Competitive swimming is a 12 month a year sport. My children participate in 2 - 4 swim meets a month. My daughter goes to regional meets and hopefully, national meets soon. Swim team takes time, a lot of time.
Back to the original question and title of this post, "How do you do it all?" Lots of women (including my own mother) often comment to me, "I don't know how you do everything you do." The truth is that I don't do everything. I have the same number of hours in my day as everybody else and I must pick and choose what I think is the best use of my time for my family and me.
I'm no expert on time management and nobody is asking me to write a book about how to be the perfectly organized homeschool swim mom. Regardless, I am able to accomplish all that I do in large part by not doing lots of things. In my 8 years of homeschooling, I've found that I have to just say no to lots of things in order to have the time to do the things that are important to our family. Before you read my list of things that I do not do, please keep in mind that this is the list that works for me - I am in no way suggesting that you shouldn't do any of the items on my list.
The List of Things I DO NOT DO:
- I don't make breakfast for my kids. My youngest child is 9 so all three of them are capable of making something for themselves for breakfast. They eat a wide variety of foods for breakfast, from peanut butter bagels to fruit and yogurt smoothies. My middle son often makes a sandwich for breakfast. My teenage daughter sometimes makes eggs for herself but she usually has a heaping bowl of cereal. Of course, they would LOVE for me to make a traditional breakfast but I'm usually finishing getting dressed, walking on the treadmill, or just plain busy at that time.
- I don't go out with friends alone, attend mother's meeting, bible studies at church, or homeschool support group meetings. I used to do all of those things but, over time, I just found that I simply don't have time to engage in activities that do not include my family. Now, I do attend two homeschool conventions each year and am a regular church attender. I would love to do many of those things and will in a different season of my life but right now I don't have the time to do so.
- I don't make fancy meals and I'm not afraid to go to Taco Bell if I'm desperate. Well, I just don't do fancy meals, ever. I use my crock pot a ton and make lots of fast, easy, simple meals. While I try to keep a tight limit on the amount of fast food my family consumes, I don't beat myself up for a week if we are desperate and drive through a fast-food restaurant. This usually happens if I don't bring food for my voraciously hungry swimmers when I pick them up from swim team and I'm afraid they're going to try to eat me. I try to bring a cooler of food for them, for my own safety.
- I don't go shopping for fun and I never go to the mall. OK, so this one is no big sacrifice for me because I really dislike shopping, but still. I can't even remember the last time I went to a mall. I'm not sure my kids have ever been to one. Now, I do go shopping and I like Target as much as the next person but I only go when I have a significant list of purchases that are needed.
- I don't do all of the shopping. My wonderful husband does most of our grocery shopping at Aldi. Bless that wonderful man.
- I don't do all of the cleaning. About two years ago when I was truly struggling to keep up with everything and I had just taken on another responsibility for our family business, my husband and I decided to get some help with the cleaning. We have a delightful lady who comes in twice a month to clean. She has been such a blessing to our family. I am so grateful that we have been able to work this expense into our budget because having some help has been such a tremendous weight off my shoulders.
- My husband and I very, very rarely go out on dates. I wish we could but our schedule just doesn't allow for it very often.
- I don't do Facebook or Twitter. I'm sure I would very much enjoy both of them. But, I try very hard to limit the amount of time I spend on the computer that is not actively productive.
- I don't talk on the phone. Other than a long phone call about every other month to my best friend who lives out of state, I don't talk on the phone. My phone conversations are very short and I prefer to handle most communications via e-mail.
- I don't garden, bake my own bread regularly, or keep chickens. I think all of those things are VERY good things and I would like to do them when I have more time. I have found that when I meet people and they find out I'm homeschooling, they sometimes assume that I do all of those things. I don't.
- I don't watch television aimlessly. I would like too, I really would. I could easily lapse into couch-potato mode quite easily. When I watch television, I watch a program that I really want to see and I walk on the treadmill, fold laundry, cut out lapbook parts, or do some other mindless task while watching.
- I don't leave the house during the day - those hours are reserved for school. We don't go on very many field trips unless they are directly linked to what we are studying. My children don't participate in the many and wonderful classes at local museums, science centers, and other educational venues. We simply need time at home to accomplish all that I want to accomplish with my children in school.
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